Friday, February 26, 2010

Lithuanian Skater Refuses to Shave Armpit Hair

"I am actually a very talented performer," says Lithuanian figure skater Kristina Orbakaite. "I just wish people would stop talking about my armpit hair." But people will not stop, and as Orbakaite stepped on to the ice yesterday for her performance in the women's short event, a disturbing quiet descended over the crowd. "It's the armpit hair girl," spectators whispered.
"I'd like that they stop," says Orbakaite. "I could shave but, come on. It's time people get past it and see me as a skater." The Lithuanian government has made entreaties to the skating star, going so far as to organize a personal appeal from President Dalia Grybauskaite in the Olympic locker room. "If we wish the world not to see us as an Eastern European nation," the president reportedly told the young lady, "then our top skater should not have fur bushes under her arms."
The population of Lithuania, though, does not agree, and the Orbakaite style can be seen everywhere on the streets of Vilnius, where an estimated 95 percent of the women have stopped shaving their armpits. "I think it's disgusting," said a visiting American male tourist. "I've heard that Lithuanian chicks were hot, but this ruins it for me." The Catholic Church, however, is quite happy with the trend and the Cardinal of Lithuania has made multiple trips to the Vatican to promote the fashion as a prophylactic device and to seek a sponsorship for Orbakaite who recently lost support from Lithuania's largest spray-on hair removal maker. "I'm not shaving my fur bushes," Orbakaite told ESPN after skating to perfect tens, thrusting her arms in the air to express her joy.
Orbakaite (above) says armpit hair is girlicious.

5 comments:

  1. This is just SICK. Is that a man's armpit?

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  2. Breaking news: Kristina Orbakaite and the Lithuanian government have, after lengthy negotiations, reached a compromise. Kristina Orbakaite will reduce 50% of her armpit hair in exchange for an undisclosed sum of Western hard currency. According to Orbakaite, this means she will shave either her left or right armpit. A government spokesman was not immediately available for a comment.

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  3. I think the hair care is very important for every woman, because the hair represent one of the most attractive point. A woman can even conquer a man just with a beautiful hair, and when that happend is better the man buy viagra for a great sexual performance.

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  4. Shaving isn't exactly a written rule. I find it quite amusing why people buzz over it. Hmm... I think it's Kristina's call whether to get rid of her bushy armpits or not. It's her armpits anyway. LOL.

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  5. My mother and my wife both have armpit hair. It's sexy. I can't wait till our 10 year old daughter enters puberty. My wife and I have decided that she too will not shave. It's liberating and I can't believe I found a woman just like my Mom. I am a lucky guy!

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