Viva la Lietuva

LONDON. Lithuania's economic growth will remain "sluggish" for at least three years, Moody's Investors Service said. The country's Baa1 government bond ratings reflect its “high institutional strength, its rising government debt, and its ongoing battle with cholesterol," Moody's said in a sovereign credit report on Lithuania today. Kenneth Orchard, Vice President of Moody's, said "Lithuania's economy has long rested on its rich diet of pork fat, cepelinis, and bacon wrapped banana desserts. This has been damaged by the crisis, and growth is unlikely to return in the foreseeable future.
The problem is one of digestion,” said Orchard. In places like Spain, they have ‘vegetables,’ which come from the Latin ‘vegetabilis,’ meaning ‘things you eat that don’t make you fat,’ he said. “Lithuanian doesn’t even have a word for ‘vegetable,’ which has both macroeconomic and gastrointestinal consequences. For this reason,” said Orchard, “we recommend that Lithuania annex itself to Spain. Spanish vegetables would help Lithuania’s economy and its GI tract. Add some flamenco dancing and sangria, and half the population of the UK would relocate, or at least visit more often.”