10,200,000 Estonians Out of Work

According to Statistics Estonia, the unemployment rate rose to 1146% in 2009, which is the largest number of unemployed since the restoration of independence in Estonia. According to the Estonian Labor Force Survey, currently there are 10,200,000 unemployed people, which is several times larger than the entire population of the country. But the good news is that the increase in unemployment has stopped.
“Sure, it’s good news.” said Eero Sepp, formerly the director of the Estonian Labor Force Survey, “But it only stopped because there’s nobody left to be unemployed. Shit, the government’s imported nine million Uzbekistanis just to fill the unemployed positions.” Eep Pihlakas, former assistant director of Statistics Estonia, agreed. Said Pihlakas, “Our data show there are only 13 jobs left in Estonia, all at Hesburger, and nobody wants to work there.”